Something is wrong with me and I don’t know what it is. I get angry at the weirdest things. Recently I have been so worked up I can’t help myself but vent about things that I later realise that I don’t want to.

Crispy Chips: I am sorry if I hurt you. I really am, I didn’t mean to. I don’t know what I am thinking and I have been angry at myself recently. I shouldn’t have posted that blog but instead I should have talked to you. I wish I could go back to Monday, where everything was sorted out and you talked to me. If I could I would not have said what I said as I know what is going on in your life and shouldn’t have pushed it. I know who much I have hurt you even though I haven’t talked to you since Monday. I can tell how much you hate me. . I haven’t been thinking right at the moment and I have so much pressure on me by my parents and others that I can’t help but be angry at things that don’t exist. I am really sorry that I said that stuff, I don’t know what is wrong with me, I am not being myself and I hate it.

I hate not being able to talk you, after everything that has happened even though it wasn’t your fault. There are quick glances, and group acknowledgements but nothing solid and I hate that. I want to say sorry to you in person but everything I go to talk to you I feel horrible for what I did and I see that you don’t want to talk to me. I wave and I don’t see a reply that makes me feel more like an idiot as everything was sorted out and then I go and put my big foot in and wreck it. I hate myself so much right now and it makes me angrier that I can’t do anything to help it.

I never thought anyone actually read this blog by evidently people do which includes you. I am so sorry for anything I have done to you, and to others involved. I hope that you will read this blog soon as with everything that is happening I can’t afford to loose another of my close friends that I love to something so stupid on my behalf. I want to pick up my phone and text you so say what I have just said in this blog but I am worried that if I do that you want reply and ignore my text leaving me to wonder if you got it.

Homer: To my other friend, I am also sorry for not talking you personally. I know I can come to you for anything and you will be there for me. Like today it made me feel so good that you talked to me during our lesson. I need to talk to you as something is wrong with me and I can’t continue living like this hating myself. Today during drama Emma told me how much I have hurt you and I feel really bad. I don’t know why I felt as though I couldn’t come to you. You are one of the only people I can talk you and Monday I felt so bad after you texted me and after you told me what happened that night. I don’t want to leave my last year with people hating me and I want to be there for you when we are older. There was a point in time where I thought that I had lost you as a friend last year but after everything that happened I can see that you will always be there for me. I don’t know what made me feel as though I had lost you but it made me feel distant.

Squally: Thank you so much, you don’t know how much I love you. Last term I felt as though I couldn’t talk to you even though I really wanted to. I am glad that I now can talk to you about stuff in my life but it makes me feel one hundred times better knowing that you know and yet are still there for me. Thankyou for today at lunch, I don’t know what to say. You made me feel so good after my drama news and you were just there to make me feel like someone needed me.

Blanche: I blogged about you a couple of weeks ago about something that I was meant to talk to you about and I am not sure if you replied but the way that you are acting is making me so happy. You are one of my closest friends and I didn’t want to loose you. You are always there to make me feel better about myself and I know that you will always be there for me and I hope that I can do the same to you.

I cant imagine what my life would be like if i didn't have friends like you guys and i dont want to learn the hard way of what life could be like. I hope you all read this blog and know how much you all mean to me.

Smithy Xx