It is offical 7 has now become 8. I know i said this a couple of months ago but now it is true and has become a reality. And i HATE it.

This year so much has happened to me.

There was 190 days that i could have spent focusing upon myself but instead there wasn't a day that passed that i didn't think about someone else. I hate that i wasted my time on them and that i hurt others by what i did. But i couldn't help it. I am not a robot that you can just turn the switch off when you say so. I am not one of these people no matter what you say say or what you want me to do.

I don't think i have ever hated someone in my life as much as i do now. You know that i hate you and you like that. You want to earn my trust back and i love that you want to do that, but i am not totally sure what to say.

I have never been put in this position where someone has hurt me. I am not sure what to do. I know i have never felt this feeling before or have ever been put in this position to have to decide what to do. I am not sure of i should forgive you or just leave me hating you for what you did.....????

I know that later there is a possibility that i will hate myself for posting this but i feel as though i need to.