With every thought processing through my mind, moving on seems impossible. It seems like a lifetime.
My stress levels have hit an all time high. I miss you. I crave you. I am sick. I have full time work. I have full time study. But you not here to tell me its alright, you are not here to hold me.
I feel like the breath in my lungs has been sucked from underneath me. You blame me for something I did not do. How am I meant to fix this? I didn't know what I did wrong so I couldn't have told anyone anything, thats all I told that, that I didn't know why. How is it right to be punished for something that isn't capable of doing without knowing? I ask myself this everyday. But I love you. I never stopped loving you. I just can't let you go. But I must...I must figure out who I truly want to love or should love...
He who uses me. I wish you were not so much of a jerk, then maybe I would agree, but you would still use me.
He who wants me. I do not want you anymore. That was a long time ago. I am sick of taking care of you and listening to you whinge day after day you make me depressed and its not healthy.
He who is my dream man. I feel so awkward. We are so awkward since I told you my secret. You rarely talk to me. I know your not a jerk, but you act like we should never talk again. Like all you wanted was a fling.
He who I met 1 week ago. You are sweet, but you smoke. You make me laugh, but you always put yourself down. I feel like a retard talking to you cause I say silly things when I am nervous, all girls do...don't you get that?
I still do not know who!!
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